EXCAVATING YOURSELF FROM THE RUBBLE
I've never felt more free to be myself than now, although it's still a journey I'm on.
And I've learnt that being authentically 'you' is the greatest gift you can give. Because God made you uniquely yourself in all your complex beauty - there is no other person on this earth or who has ever lived that is like you. Only you can fulfil your role and, joined with Christ by his Holy Spirit, you are so powerful for good.
But we can get buried under piles of...rubble over the years.
I found myself in controlling situations for long periods of my life and not having the assertiveness and self respect to stand up for myself. That how I lost touch with my authenticity to a considerable extent, my 'mehood' gradually getting buried by the fear of man, people pleasing and keeping the peace.
When I finally took control of my life and rose like a phoenix fom the ashes it was so liberating even though the circumstances were very sad and painful.
An important part of this was to throw off the victim mentality and take responsibility for my choices. We cant change our circumstances but we are responsible for our responses to them, once we are adults. My choices are My choices, I cant blame anyone else fo them. To the extent I had a victim mentality, to that extent I had buried part of myself.
I think excavating our true selves from all the piles of outside pressures and painful experiences is a lifelong journey..but worth it. To be free to be authentically ourselves is a place of joy. I believe God delights in this. Carrying this through into Christian ministry can be a challenge - there are just as many expectations there as in 'worldly' social situations. But I want to aim to be more fully myself and then love God and people with a more deep and genuine love as time goes by.
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